3:50 Pm

We didn't pack everything. We did do the laundry that was in her hamper. Kezia and her mom did that. I went up and grabbed a shirt and smelled it. her scent. my heart broke. I miss her so much. all i do is think about her.

I got a lot done today. i broke down cardboard boxes and bundled them for recycle as well as did some tidying of the yard. I need to adjust my snow blower so its tighter. a pretty simple process, just need to do it. I was really looking forward to snowplowing paths in the back yard so i could pull her around on the sled.. like we did last year. she really enjoyed it last year, she would have had a blast this year.

deep breath.

i know kezia is having a hard time too. she keeps thinking about how she wishes we brought Saoirse to sloan sooner. i wish the same thing. i was concerned that we went to long with out any type of treatment after induction therapy. doctors told me we have some time. we didn't. i know that this is all part of the grieving process.. but that doesn't lessen the feelings and impact. not yet.

I am pretty much done organizing and cleaning for the day. I may go out to the garage later tonight and work on cleaning my work bench. I have an art project I want to work on and need the space. I also want to hook up the wood stove that is out there.

deep breath.